They Never Met
An occasional series


Johnny Vegas
v
A Thong

VEGAS:
I'm colourful and big down south.

THONG:
SNAP!













Some of these have been made up.

 

>> 2007
Master Plan for taking over the world using the Internet
Web
Rich Content including video is to be launched by the end of the year; soon there will be 'www.britishbitcomedy.co.uk.'

 

>> 2006
Visiting Middle Earth
Hobbiton
We write the fourth book of 'The Lord of The Rings' 'The Ring of Loss.'

 

>> Late 2005
BBC 'Finish The Sitcom' Competition
BBC3
Jim makes the last 50 our of 5,876 scripts with his version of 'Last Quango in Harris.'

 

>> Autumn 2005
Shoot The Writers Competition Broadcast
ITV1
The 'cheapest show on TV' broadcasts two scripts from the DreamDrill archive, including 'The Sperm.'


>> 3rd September 2005
DreamDrill Web site
Hertfordshire
The final nail banged into the Web site.

>> 12th July 2004
The Italian Job, with an Italian
A Theatre Near You
A two act play. Almost gets performed. Very close but the Italian left the country pleading a prior engagement with his mother.

>> 13th - 18th April 2000
DreamDuel
The Hen & Chickens, Highbury
Nearest Tube, Highbury & Islington (Victoria)
A one Act play. What happens when a man's shadow leaves him and he has to fight to win her back armed only with his dreams.

>> 32nd March 1999
Billy Connolly
At Home
Tells a joke about fish and the royal family.
He is knighted.

>> 19th February 1975
Ray Winstone
Berkshire
Leaves Eton and starts work as nail technician at the Hurlingham Club.

>> 14th January 1952
Jim's Mother Launched on the Clyde. View Blip
Glasgow

>> 13th February 1938
Oliver Reed Born
Wimbledon
Sixty plus years of life ending in ' Consider Yourself .'

>> 15th August 1945
World War II Ends
The start of rationalising.

>> 1642 - 1648
English Civil War
Various locations
It was bound to happen

>> 0
Locations world wide
Boom!

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